questions? more questions. why me? was it my fault? wat do i do now? does life have to be like this? isnt there a better way to look at it? am i paranoid? why am i so scared? why am i writing? why am i alive? am i alive or am i existing?  does everyone go through this? does blogging work? should i stop talking altogether? will people approve of this? does it matter if people disagrre?does anyone care? will anyone understand this? does it make a difference? will someone reply? why cant i talk straight? is there a god? are people nice ever?am i just self-pitying? why am i not happy? is there anything lacking in my life? will i ever get answers? shuld i take sanyas? do i have wat it takes? ............